Cypress Social: Buck-a-Shuck!

After seeing a glowing post from some friends with their dozen oysters for a buck at Cypress Social in North Little Rock (Maumelle), my husband and I decided we would head out. I put on pants with a zipper, or as a friend calls them during COVID, “hard pants” and off we went.

Personally, I can’t do oysters on the half shell. It’s a texture thing. I’m going to do you a favor and tell this story down below after the “Good Eats” portion of this post. You’re welcome. Oh, and if you have sympathy gagging reflex and are a visual thinker…consider this your trigger warning to skip this hilarious and horrible story altogether. If not, this is a good one y’all!

Anyhow, back to Cypress Social. The food here is outstanding and we have a special affinity for the cocktails. The bar manager, Rob Roy Armstrong is so talented and humble. If you can make happy hour, you definitely want to work that in. The cocktails are thoughtful and complex. A lot like how I like my men! My husband, Fitz, is both of these things.

He decides to get the Rain is a Good Thing (Devil’s River Bourbon, Bonal, lime, corn shoots) & I the Hissy Fit (Rancho Alegre Tequila, Pierre Ferrand curacao, lime, dragon fruit-jalapeno syrup). Both did not disappoint and worth ditching our no drinking during the week vow even if we only made it to Monday. This COVID/40 something bod isn’t going to magically drop and give me 20 on its own apparently, so I’m trying to cut calories. You can see it’s going well.

They ran out of their oysters on the half shell just as we arrived so we went with a half-order (6) of Charbroiled Oyster (Gulf oysters, garlic-herb butter, Parmasean, crispy andouille lardon) appetizer. I can do Oysters Florentine, Rockefeller, Bienville, and apparently charbroiled oysters as long as they have another element, another texture. We both thought they were okay but not great. Of course, that didn’t keep us from each finishing our three each. 😋

Fitz decided to go with a half order (3) of Delta Style Hot Tamales (Beef tamale, cornmeal masa, chili sauce, Ranch, saltines). They were amazing with just enough heat, the chili sauce was rich, and the masa wasn’t thick so you could really taste the seasoned beef. And as for the Ranch…we weren’t exactly sure what that was for and we didn’t touch it. Crackers maybe? Chili all the way! The half-order was the perfect portion as well. I got to enjoy a couple of bites, so I definitely want to get my own order next time.

Remember what I said earlier about this COVID bod? Well, you see what had happened was…The dessert menu was the first menu I noticed on the table. Yep. All the desserts are the creation of pastry chef Sara Horton. Holy moly! I spied the Bourbon Chocolate Bread Pudding and it was all she wrote.

I ordered a Caesar Salad (Romaine, cornbread crouton, parmesan, creamy Caesar dressing) with a plan to have this beautiful masterpiece afterward. The Caesar was tasty but I prefer my Caesar to be heavy on the garlic and a more traditional dressing. My stepdad used to make a giant wooden standing salad bowl full of Caesar at dinner parties with homemade French bread croutons and there would not be a drop left. We’ve started making it again and make sure we have sardines on hand in case we need that garlicky, salty, fix. This is the classic Caesar salad recipe we use if you want to have a go at it. You won’t be disappointed.

Now let’s get back to that Bourbon Chocolate Bread Pudding (Bourbon, French bread, chocolate custard, candied pecans, bourbon ice cream). Oh sweet 7 lb., 6 oz. baby Jesus is this dessert worth every calorie and fat gram!!!! (And yes, all those !!!!) You probably saw that coming though, didn’t you? Chef Horton, love you, mean it! Wow! Every bite was the perfect balance of rich decadence but not overpowering with sweetness. It’s like magic. Bourbon, chocolate magic. I paired it with a 10-year-old tawny that was the perfect complement. A family friend who was the chief test pilot for Falcon Jet turned me on to ports with chocolate followed by a cigar years ago. It’s a trifecta that shouldn’t be ignored. He’s also the one who introduced me to aerobatics over the Arkansas River in an experimental jet that pulled so many Gs I kept passing out. He said it was one of his favorite flights because all he could hear was “Squeeeeeeeee! Silence. Squeeeeeee!” I dare say this bread pudding had the same effect on me.

Oyster backstory

Trigger warning: If you have a sympathetic gag reflex or weak stomach for “bathroom” talk, this story is not for you.

Personally, I can’t do oysters on the half shell. It’s a texture thing. The same thing I told my friends when we were sitting at a table years ago at The Oyster Bar in Little Rock. “Try them!” they said. “You just haven’t had them the right way!” So giving into peer pressure, I piled on some horseradish and slid that slippery little sucker into my mouth. Without any warning, I gagged and it catapulted back out of my mouth and slid to rest on the very edge of the table. The first thing that popped into my head was “Wow! If we were playing shuffleboard that would be a winner!” However, it was quickly followed by the horror of what else I was afraid was going to happen. I excused myself and quickly rushed to the bathroom.

Being a ginger, my face was flushed and red. It’s hard to tell if it was from embarrassment or just trying to avoid barfing in a germy public bathroom. That moment when you have to decide if you’re going to get your face down near a public toilet, knowing damn well that if you do, you’re definitely puking or you’re just going to hit the sink. The sink poses a real problem as well though. Because let’s just say that most likely it’s not going to go down the drain. Gulp. That means you will have to clean it out of the sink with paper towels or if there aren’t paper towels, possibly half-ply toilet paper. Well as you can imagine, this can complicate the situation even more. As well as causing a domino effect that any fine Southern lady such as myself (cough cough) would rather avoid. 👀 Thankfully, I was able to regain my wits after doing breathing exercises my mother taught me to avoid having panic attacks in college. These have come in handy several times in my life actually. (See a video below so you can practice.)

Now, I just had to work up the nerve to go back to the table. Finally, out I came and didn’t make it halfway to the table before everyone started laughing and as I sat down someone said, “I guess you really don’t like them, do you?“ We all were laughing, especially me, and that was the last time I tried a raw oyster. I know I know, your palate changes and you should always re-try things even if you didn’t care for them before. Well, let me just tell you this: I will never ever put one of those little slippery suckers in my mouth again. Definitely not going to risk that happening again! I’m OK with that. I’m OK with missing out on that. 😏